The 5 Love Languages

By Mary Allen

People express and receive love in different ways. Dr. Gary Chapman identifies these as the five languages of love".

1. Quality Time - Attention, quality conversation, time spent together doing something meaningful or enjoyable. Time is Love. Attention is love.

2. Words of Affirmation - "You are beautiful". Words of acknowledgment, encouragement, or appreciation. "You are a giving, loving, kind, warm person. I love who you are". Words of affirmation are words of love.

3. Gifts - From big to small. Flowers. Gifts. Cards. Cars. Houses. Jewelry. Stuffed Animals. Clothing. A gift can be a great gift of love. Some people feel most loved with a gift.

4. Acts of Service - Cooking dinner, washing the car, running an errand, cleaning the house, helping with a task, time spent in contribution to another.

5. Physical Touch - Affection. Massage. Making love. Of course, everyone has their favorite way to be touched. And, touch equals love to many.

Knowing these 5 Love Languages allows you to GIVE and RECEIVE love from others more fully. Of course, we all can appreciate and enjoy each "love language", however there is typically one or two that make you feel MOST LOVED. Which one is your primary love language? How do YOU show love toward those you love? What we tend to do for others, is often a clue to what we enjoy receiving most.

"If you express love in a way your partner doesn't understand, he or she won't realize you've expressed love. Perhaps your husband needs to hear encouraging words, but you feel like cooking a nice dinner will cheer him up. When he still feels down, you're puzzled. Or, maybe your wife craves time with you -- time away from the kids & TV. The flowers you gave her just don't communicate that you care."